Let’s give them a smile…
I just came back from Poland, but I feel like I am still there. I am “infected” by the climate of the homeland. One can see so many paradoxes in our native land! It seems that a happy person, enjoying free time, does not notice those in need. Does the lack of sensitivity during vacation cause a person to stop thinking? But…It is hard not to notice in Poland the obvious needs and stay unconcerned.
I cannot say why I visited the orphanage in Bialystok on Slonimska Street 2. A sudden impulse? Actually I wanted to “borrow” a small girl and take her shopping, to the movies, buy her ice cream and get to know her. I wanted to keep in touch with her, even later. It turned out that the idea was not mature enough. The people in charge of the institution did not agree to my proposition. Today I think they were right, but at the time I was upset: “so what if they do not know me, is this a reason to suspect me right away of wrongdoing?! But I want to do something good!”When I looked at the sad eyes and dogged faces of the orphans without hope for “better tomorrow” I thought with endearment and some sadness about my ten-year old son in Cleveland, and about how, after all, things are “good” for him in this America.
Yes, these children really moved me. Anybody would be moved by this sight. It is a completely different image then one brought on by the movies.
Every child represents a tragic history. All these children wait for the moment that someone will love them, be patient with them, and will embrace them with wisdom and goodness.
The orphanages in Poland, and not just the one in Bialystok, are in a difficult economic situation. They are very much in the red. Everywhere there are shortages. There is a lack of money for basic needs such as medical care for children, repairs of facilities or entertainment for children.
Thinking about the life of these children and about the economic problems of these institutions, these are two different issues. When one wants to understand better the emotions of these children, one starts to understand their feelings that there is no future for them. That they do not care about the future. They seem to be thinking only about here and now. This is characteristic of people who feel they are not loved. Only a person who is loved has dreams, makes plans for the future, tries harder and further, because he feels unlimited in possibilities, since there is someone beside him who will never doubt him. Being inside one also has an impression that these children do not try hard enough, because nobody will praise them anyway. No one will caress them or hug them. “They are different, difficult and reserved, one must approach them in a specific and special way not to harm them” – says psychologist of the Bialystok orphanage, Sylwia Malachowska.
“Get what you can and do not despair about the things you did not get” – this is the philosophy, more or less enlightened, of the orphans. It is not worth being happy with things you received, since you may quickly lose them. It is not worth asking, since no one will answer. My God, let’s try to remember how often our children bombarded us with questions when they were growing up! But the children in the orphanage cannot ask, there is no time to be a normal, full of curiosity child…
We can talk about it forever, but the conclusion is always going to be the same – even the best orphanage will never give the child the love that a mother could give it…
I know that we probably do not have the time to think about the fate of lost children. We see so many problems closer to us: hurricanes, sicknesses, terrorism, and our own “miseries”. But… somehow I cannot put away the thought about Christmas brought to my mind in Poland – it is time for joy, for family shopping, for dressing up of the Christmas tree. Is it so everywhere?
And this is why, during the meeting of Forum, nudged by an impulse, I proposed organizing help for children, precisely for those in the Bialystok orphanage. The motive is “trivial” – I thought that the easiest thing to do in America is to admire the intimate candlelight by the hearth, attend holiday ceremonies throughout December. We have so many of them…and remember about people for whom life is not so “sweet”. Maybe something could be done about it instead of just “remembering”?
I then proposed help for orphanages in Poland. This is going to be something of a Christmas gift from the staff of Forum to the children who do not expect a lot, but enjoy everything they get. This is going to be a gift that will bring a smile to their faces, a gift… no one can return to the store after the holidays because the closets are so full, that they cannot be closed. After all…, why does one need another name-brand piece of clothing?!
I found with relief that the staff of Forum accepted my proposal enthusiastically, without a doubt. I contacted through e-mail the psychologist of the orphanage we intend to help. She is touched and says our gift will help with some of the many, many needs they have.
I am addressing now the readers of Forum and the sympathizers of Centrum to help our “Christmas action”. To increase the amount of money to be sent to Poland they can call:
(216) 662 – 0195 or (216) 407 – 8153
I probably do not have to add here, that any amount will be gratefully accepted, and is equally important to us. In the name of staff of Forum I wish everyone Merry Christmas, and in the name of children that we do not yet know, but whom we can help, I thank you in advance believing you have noble hearts.
Agata Foremska
Translated by Józef Hart
Forum, 12/2005
Tags: bialystok, Forum, free time, medical care, orphanage, orphanages, sad eyes, small girl, sudden impulse, tragic history
